Author: Aliya Saulson, LCSW
Therapy is such an intimate treatment setting, and the research shows that the biggest factor of success in clients’ therapy is actually the relationship they have with a therapist. So, it’s natural to want to be selective about the provider you’re going to enter this space with. And especially for members of marginalized communities, who have historically been harmed by the mental health field and experienced pathologization of identity, it can be vital to have a therapist who welcomes your whole self and who’s thought about you before you even walk in the room.
Finding a therapist who affirms and supports your identity (whether that’s related to gender, neurodivergence, sexuality, culture, race, age, disability, religion, citizenship status, socioeconomic status, or other aspects of who you are) can make therapy feel safer and more effective.
Ask yourself what your needs are
What does identity-affirming mean for you? Is it important that your therapist shares aspects of your identity (queer, trans, BIPOC, neurodivergent, religious, etc.) or that they are simply well-educated, respectful, and affirming of it?
Check out their website and experience listed
Remember that the therapist has a heavy say (if not complete say) in how they are advertised online, which means they’ve decided what information is important to share with potential clients. Does the provider indicate having experience working with people who look like you or share your identities? Does the provider have any signatories that indicate they are welcoming of all identities (pronouns listed, pride/trans flag posted, Black Lives Matter image, land acknowledgment, etc.)? Does the provider mention any of their own identities in their bio?
Check out their social media/blogs/presentations
Have they given presentations, written blogs, or made social media posts dedicated to celebrating different communities? If they advertise working with trauma, are they trauma-informed when it comes to traumatic experiences of discrimination and microaggressions?
Check out specialized directories
Some therapist directories let you filter for different identities. Some of my go tos are: Therapy Den, Inclusive Therapists, Therapy for Black Girls, Charlotte Trans Health, OutCare Health, and Asian Mental Health Collective.
Be on the lookout for red flags
Do they indicate doing things like conversion therapy (more recently rebranded as “gender exploratory therapy”) or encouraging masking? Avoid therapists who minimize identity concerns. For example, “I treat everyone the same” may mean they overlook systemic realities. Watch out for language that feels pathologizing or dismissive.
Seek community recommendations
Ask friends, community groups, support groups, or online forums centered around your identity if they have recommendations. Local LGBTQ+ centers, cultural organizations, or disability justice collectives often keep referral lists.
Ask to set up an intro consultation
Most therapists, like those at ChangeWell Psych, offer free 15-minute consultations to assess goodness of fit before you even have a first session. Don’t be afraid to ask about a provider’s comfort level or experience in working with somebody who has the identities you have. This is a great opportunity to ask questions like:
- “How do you approach working with [LGBTQ+ clients / clients of color / disabled clients]?”
- “What is your perspective on neurodiversity?”
- “What training or experience do you have supporting clients with [my identity/experience]?”
- “How do you address power, privilege, and oppression in the therapy space?”
- “What’s your position on involving police in mental health crises?”
- “Do you use affirming practices (e.g., chosen names and pronouns)?”
A good therapist won’t be defensive; they’ll answer openly, respectfully, and seriously.
Additionally, notice how you feel after the consultation: did you feel seen, respected, safe, or did you feel the need to explain/defend your identity?
I usually tell people in my life seeking a therapist – clients and friends alike – to give a new therapist a try for four sessions. If it’s the right fit, you’ll know it in your gut. And if it’s not, you’ll get a clear gut reaction informing you of that, too!
Are you ready to schedule a consultation with a therapist?
Our provider directory has over 50 vetted options in the Charlotte Metro Area, including Aliya and others at ChangeWell Psych!